Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Do you have a permit, Sir?

An hour before heading off to the Great Buckeye State, Joe informed me that he’d be "conducting an experiment" during our drive. Hmm. This sounded a bit odd, but my curiosity was piqued.

He placed a non-descript box full of metal parts on the kitchen floor next to the label maker. Then, he pulled out 5 flat metal plates, vital components to the experiment, and carefully placed a new label on each.

Did I mention that Joe is the ring leader of our local Geek Squad chapter? He LIVES to label things.

Jonas was especially interested in the label maker. We had to wrestle it away from him after an hour.

“Joe--where the hell are we going to put these?? We have no room as it is, between the car seat, the dog, the dog bed, the toys, the luggage, food...”

He disappeared down the basement stairs, mumbling something that I took to be a response, although I understood none of it.

Down below, I heard the sounds of the file, the drill, and the hammer. A half hour later, he resurfaced with all five metal plates securely fastened to a long lacrosse-stick looking thing, and headed out the front door to attach this contraption to the roof rack. I couldn’t visualize how this was going to work, but I thought, maybe once I see it finished, it’ll all make perfect sense.

Another half hour rushed by. I thought I’d better go and investigate just what was taking so long.

Oh Lord. What is that?? As Joe tightened the last bolts, I felt like I was watching Dr. Emmet Brown from Back to the Future working on our Subaru! Yes, it's true: Joe is part Emmet Brown.

Our weighted-down car looked ridiculous. Between the bike and the “coffin box”, and the perpendicular science experiment, the only things missing were streamers and some random zoo animals sticking their heads out the windows.

Knowing how serious Joe was about this, I was certain there was no point in pleading, “Do we really have to drive the whole way there and back, with this ridiculous looking contraption jutting out to the side, begging to impale another vehicle?”

Instead, I said, “Good evening, Dr. Brown…” “Whatcha got here? Do you have a permit for that?”

In case you’re curious, the experiment was work-related and it would appear that it was somewhat successful. All I know is that we caught a yellow jacket between two plates, I bumped my head a number of times, and we got a lot of puzzled and dirty looks.


Anonymous said...

Lizzy: the only thing missing from that car would be the "flux capaciter"!!!! LOL

Anonymous said...

I love Emmet...he's an alltime favorite movie character! So, go ahead Joe. You picked a good role model! Love Mom